We’ve all been there. Standing in the grocery store, witnessing the fit of all fits. A level five conniption. Little Jr. doesn’t want to stay in the buggy/wants to open the Cheerios/pours said Cheerios all over the aisle. His poor mama is flustered and embarrassed as you push your buggy through the cereal road block.

Do you…
a. Ignore the screaming child and mother and think smugly to yourself that your precious child would NEVER act like that?
b. Stop and point out everything the mom is doing wrong, and tell her the correct (i.e., YOUR) way of handling the situation?
c. Stop and tell the mama that it happens to everyone and offer to help?

I think most of us with small kids have been on both sides of this scenario. A couple of weeks ago, we were in Kroger and G was in the buggy. Wells decided he wanted to garbage man (stand on the side) while I was turned around to get something. You know what happened next, right? He flipped the freaking buggy over… with G in it. Luckily, SK saw what was about to happen and got there in time to save G from the pile of grocery rubble. I was mortified. I accidentally made eye contact with the MOM OF THE YEAR as she was passing judgement on my little dysfunctional family. Good thing we weren’t near the kitchen tools, because I thought about cutting that witch.

It is a never ending battle. Not between parents and children, but between mothers. Working mothers versus the stay at homes. Breastfeeders versus the bottle pushers. Huggies users versus the tree huggers (cloth diapers). The list goes on and on and on. And most of us are guilty of thinking that our way is the right ONLY way. Well guess what? It isn’t. Every child is different, and what works with one isn’t necessarily going to work with another. Every mom is different too. Just because you feel it is important to breastfeed your child until he is four doesn’t mean the rest of us are selfish for not doing so. I hate to be the one to break it to you, but your little angel is not perfect. You do everything right, and she does everything right, and then one day she writes on your walls with her poop. If you think or God forbid say aloud, “Little Mary Sue Ellen is such an artist… so creative and look at the way she improvised!” you are probably too far gone.

I’m not saying it is bad to offer advice to other moms IF they ask for it. Some great parenting “tricks” came from discussions with my friends about what works and what doesn’t. And it is a relief to talk to other moms who admit this shizzz is hard. Let’s just try not to turn said discussions into a mommy guiltfest… “You DON’T buy exclusively ORGANIC?” I have gone down the my versus your way path and it never ended up pretty. We would be better off if we accepted that we are all in this together. Let’s start lifting each other up instead of ripping each other apart. Let’s start offering to help (or at least not judging) that poor mama in the grocery store. Let’s start praying for each other because we all know we need it.

I am in.